A little catch up, a repeat, and the discouragement that set off the lazy bomb

So about the long title.  The last time I posted was last Spring semester.  The fall brought uninteresting classes.  I don't even think I remember what they were.  The spring brought some interesting stuff.  I started out with 16 hours but dropped it to allow for more time to study.  HA! I'll tell you what happened with that.  Nothing.  "Oh I have 6 hours 3 days a week until the project is due.  I have time for Hulu."  Sigh.  One class was out of my grasp and I didn't work hard enough, so I failed it.  It's a class in my major.  Double sigh.  I'm repeating that class this semester.  Yay. Maybe. 

This summer I did an awesome internship.  And the internship was extended through April.  Awesome.  

I have three more semesters, not including summers, and including this semester.  I should graduate December 2014.   *groan*

So I have 16 credit hours of classes this semester.  I sit in a classroom for 18.  I work about 20 hours, and I've been diligently at the library with every spare moment doing homework that wasn't required, reading the textbooks (do wha?!?!), and studying like crazy.  I get a C on my first assignment in one class (mind you this is a class on a topic I've been doing in the work world for YEARS), a B on a test, failed a project.  After working my tail off until 1 am and going to work at 4 am and sticking that together with 18 hour days, I can assure you the attitude I have currently is that I don't care.  I don't want to study.  Why bother?  I did all the homework, reading, extra practice, and two practice tests for Physics in preparation for the test.  I'm exceedingly good in Physics.  I got an A on BOTH practice tests and most of the practice problems I solved correctly.  I made an 84 on the test.  Talk about a demotivational poster.  Yes, work your butt off.  No one will know anyways.  So now all I want to do is sit at home and play games.  Or sleep.  Because I'm tired.  I don't want to do assignments until I absolutely have to.  

I will say the best moment in the last couple weeks was when I got a program to work in the class I failed last semester (That I'm retaking this semester).  I couldn't breathe I was so excited.  I turned in the project in time for its due date today, and I'm nervous about what I did wrong that will end up failing me, even though I put in hours and hours and hours of work on that project, and talked it over and over and over with my ever-patient boyfriend.  

Hopefully things will turn around before I manage to put myself into a hole.  I can't afford to fail more classes, but right now I don't care.  I'm so done with this broken education system.  Because of the work experience I have, the diploma is a *formality*.  Ugh.  I'm not happy about devoting my life for the next year and a half for a formality.  Gross.  

I'm hopeful about my upcoming projects.  And I have another Physics test next week.  I can do this!

Until next time,
:)